Yiras Shamayim
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Loading ...Today’s Question: Yiras Shamayim
In the text of Birchas HaChodesh why do we pray for Yiras Shamayim two times?
Yesterday’s Question: Father’s Mercy
“As a father has mercy on his son, so may God have compassion on us.” We say it all the time in prayer and it’s stated in Tehillim (103:13) and the Midrash even says “no one has mercy like a father.” Is not the trait of mercy a mother’s specialty?!
Our Answer:
We must define proper mercy!
The Yalkut Shimoni states that “no one gives mercy as well as a father and no one gives comfort (“nechama”) as well as a mother.”
The woman is more prone to compassion, this however is not always stemming from logic but rather from her emotional feelings towards the one in need. This is not the Torah’s proper dose of mercy that will work for the child. A woman’s mercy naturally just wants to give in to the child’s every want. However, this really is not the proper way to teach him! It is equivalent to a diabetic asking for a candy bar when it can endanger his life. Emotional compassion dictates not to turn down his request. Logical compassion states that the ultimate mercy is to withhold it from him for his own good and care! This is extreme and obvious but often the application applies however it is not as obvious. It goes without saying that a good mother trains herself to think in the proper way. However, the Midrash is still highlighting the difference between the male and female natures!
When one is comforting someone after a loss, for example of a loved one, then utter outpouring and unlimited emotion without logic is precisely what is appropriate. This is what most women can offer better than men!
Hence, the Midrash is contrasting the two roles and thereby explaining them both. A man knows how to feel compassion for his son but it is with the correct logical reservation to assure that the child will receive his requests in the healthiest way. It is not totally emotionally driver, rather it is well thought out and controlled. This is the most healthy way to express compassion for sometimes the child needs to be punished and the parent’s feelings of mercy must be put on the side. Rather love and mercy dictates that he must teach the child the lesson. In comforting, the woman who shares an outpouring of her emotions to sympathize unlimitedly with the one in pain is surely the most effective approach.
Categories: The Daily Question
