As Yourself – Parshas Kedoshim 5769
(No Ratings Yet)
Loading ...ואהבת לרעך כמוך (יט:יח).
“You shall love your friend as yourself” (19:18)
Rebbe Akiva says that an important principle of the Torah is that one should love his friend as he does himself. Let us delve into this to understand what this great Mitzvah entails.
The Gemara in Bava Metziya (62a) tells us of a frightening scenario. Two people are traveling in a desolate desert and they run out of water. One of them has one small portion of water left, however, it is not sufficient for both of them. There is only enough for one person to drink to enable him to reach the closest city safely. If they split it, they will both die. What should he do? One opinion states that the owner of the water should split it between the two of them rather than watch his friend die on his account (even though this action dictates that both of them will not make it)! Another opinion argues and says that you must NOT share it, rather you must keep it all for yourself, as the Torah dictates that “חייך קודמים, your own safety takes precedence!” One of these two opinions is that of our Rebbe Akiva, which one do you think he opted for?
Astonishingly, he is the latter, dictating that one must care for himself first! How does this coincide with his view on the importance of loving your friend as yourself!?
The explanation is as follows. The two statements of Rebbe Akiva are far from contradictory; in fact they both develop upon one another! Allow me to explain.
How often do we meet someone who loves to care and do kindness for others. He will do anything to assist someone in need. Yet when it comes to his own live he is not happy or fulfilled and is rather miserable! Why does this happen and how could it be avoided?
The answer is that he knows how to properly treat everyone, well almost everyone, except for one person…. himself! The foundation for proper love for your friend is proper treatment of yourself. The standard for how to love your friend is כמוך, like yourself! Thus, the prerequisite for loving your friend is treating yourself right first.
Hashem teaches man that: your life is most important, you must fend for your own self first. After you have taken care of yourself, after you have filled yourself up with chessed from the inside, then this could spill forth, overflowing onto everyone else as well. If this is not done, then one will quickly find himself used and spent with nothing else left to give to others as he has burned out from self neglect.
Indeed, Rebbe Akiva entrusts us with the ever important directive of taking care of our fellow people. However, he teaches us that the proper way to do this is by beginning with care of our own selves first. This way, our kindness will spill forth and be shared healthily with the maximum benefactors receiving it! May we all succeed in fulfilling this noble ideal!
Categories: Parshas Kedoshim Bein Adam L'Chavayro, Chessed, Love
