Close To Torah

ותען אסתר ותאמר שאלתי ובקשתי (אסתר ה:ז).

“Esther responded saying, ‘please grant me my request and my plea!’” (Esther 5:7).

Most Significant

This verse is in one way the most significant one in the entire Megillah! How so? There are one hundred and sixty-seven verses contained throughout the entire ten chapters of this scroll. The middle verse is thus the eighty-forth one (with eighty-three before and after it). This is our verse. I would like to illustrate how the middle verse captures the essence of the entire Sefer and what that means for us based on our present study.

What’s Going On Here?

There is a fascinating thesis that states, if one wishes to understand the theme of a Torah portion, he must study the first, middle and last verse of that section. For example to understand Parshas Bereishis, one can study the first, middle and last verse. This will encapsulate the basic idea found in the entire portion.

Proof and Explanation

This idea is hinted and elucidated quite clearly by at least two Chazal.

First, Rashi in Shabbos (55a) states that the reason that Hashem’s signet ring says “Emes” is because the word Emes is all encompassing. It is comprised of the letters Alef, Mem and Tuf. These are the first, middle and last letters of the Hebrew alphabet (אמת). This is based on the verse in Isaiah (44:5) that states, “Ani Reishon VaAni Acharon U’Mibaladoy Ain Elokim, I am first and last, there is no other God besides me”. (Rashi is basing his comments on: Shir HaShirim Rabbah (1:46) and Shemos Rabbah (4:3).) Hence, we see that there is an idea of an essence being seen from the beginning, middle and end. See also Shabbos (30b).

Secondly, the Gemara in Sotah (14a) states: Rav Simlai says that the Torah begins with Chessed, kindness, as it states, “Hashem provided Adam and his wife with clothing”, and it ends with kindness, as it says, “Hashem buried Moshe”.  The Midrash (Tanchuma Vayeira 4) adds to this: “The Torah begins with kindness in that Hashem adorned Chava in honor of her marriage to Adam. It ends with kindness by Hashem burying Moshe. Its middle expresses kindness as it states that Hashem visited Avraham when he was recuperating from his circumcision and insisted that he not stand up for Him”.

Conclusion

What emerges is clear proof that examining the beginning, middle and end of a Torah idea reveals the entire Torah theme encompassed. In the case of the entire Torah, one learns that Hashem desires for us to take the lesson of proper love and care for others. By extension, it appears that this technique can be applied to every individual Parsha and Sefer in Tanach as well.

One More Proof

Additionally, the Gemara Kiddushin (30a) tells us what the middle word of the Torah is. It is “Gachone, stomach” in Vayikrah (11:42). Why is this important for us to know? This thesis may just be the reason that Chazal found this fact important to identify. In fact, that is how the Vilna Goan explains the Gemara. He states that the middle word is the most important to know for upon it revolves the theme of the entire Torah, which proceeds and follows it. (The full development of this is beyond the scope of this essay. See the words of my dear Rebbe, Reb Aharon Feldman shlit”a, for extrapolation upon it, in “The Juggler and The King”.)

Example (You can skip to the next subtitle if you want to get back to Esther already!)

Here is a brief example of how this approach work. We will analyze one Parsha in the Torah, Parshas Va’ara.

The first verse states:

וידבר אלקים אל משה ויאמר אליו אני ה’ (ו:ב)

“Hashem spoke to Moshe saying, ‘I am God’.”

The middle verse (61 of 120) states:

ויעשו כן החרטמים בלטיהם ויעלו את הצפרדעים על ארץ מצרים (ח:ג)

“The magicians copied the plague and they too brought frogs upon the land”.

The last verse states:

ויחזק לב פרעה ולא שלח את בני ישראל כאשר דבר ה’ ביד משה (ט:לה)

“Hashem strengthened the heart of Pharaoh and he refused to release the Jews, as Hashem had foretold to Moshe”.

Briefly, the theme of the Parsha is the underpinnings which began the redemption. These three verses show that the redemption had not yet set in and that Pharaoh had not thus far accepted Hashem’s sovereignty! It wasn’t until the completion of the Ten Plagues that Pharaoh and his people were brought to their knees in subservience and awe of Hashem. The first and last verse both express this idea most clearly, it is the recurring theme of the Parsha. Hashem was displaying His Kingship and Egypt was not responding as of yet. The middle verse states that the magicians still believed that they were capable of emulating Moshe’s God-sent miracles. This is the summary of Va’ara, and is eloquently and briefly stated between all three verses, spanning the three areas of the Parsha. One question remains, why does it discuss the frogs specifically?

The frogs of Perek Shira sing the song of, “Baruch Shem Kvod Malchuso, Give praise to Hashem’s Honorable Kingdom”. The significance of this verse is that this amphibian constantly sings to Hashem. The Midrash states that when Dovid completed Sefer Tehillim, he asked Hashem if any creature sings more praises than himself. Hashem responded by sending a frog to his feet!

“Baruch Shem” is explained by the Nefesh HaChaim to express the ruler-ship of Hashem upon the earth specifically. The bottom-line theme is that although the Makos were beginning to make their impact of showing the world that Hashem dominates, as the frog declares, this message was not yet complete. This is clearly expressed by the middle verse. Egypt refused to take the lesson of Hashem’s frogs. In the next Parsha, there would finally be a change of heart and a powerful recognition. In Beshalach, the redemption would take place with great honor and an awe inspiring demonstration.

Back On Track

Having established this idea, let us now turn to our dear Megillah. The theme of the Megillah is clear. Although it may appear that there are natural events and order to the world, we must sensitize ourselves to see past them. As faithful Jews, we look to see the great Hand of Hashem guiding and propelling all of the world events. He cares for us and constantly steers our ship to safety and victory. How do we get Him to do this? The answer is well known and clear: By turning to Him and begging Him for help. When we acknowledge Him as our King, He is proud to smile in return. This is the key to our success in this world.

The first verse of the Megillah describes the grand kingdom of Achashveyrosh. It sets the backdrop for the entire climax of adversary against the Jewish nation. There was a haughty and powerful king and he used his power to concede to decimate the Jews. The last verse spells out the entire resolution. Hashem raised the Jews to a high and untouchable status. Mordechai was a powerful governmental official, who worked to insure Jewish diplomatic security. Most importantly, the nation was at peace with each other and true closeness and love between themselves and Hashem was achieved. What does the middle verse exemplify?

The Moment of Truth

The middle verse is the hint as to how we got from the crisis to the solution! “Esther cried with supplication and pleas!” This hints to her true cries and the collective tears of the entire nation, who at that time turned sincerely to Hashem with all of their hearts. The nation committed themselves to repent and mend their ways. This is the entire lesson of the Megillah, to turn to Hashem and put our trust in Him!  The middle verse is the crux of the entire Sefer. When we daven to and connect to Hashem, He hears us and takes care of His precious children.

Number of Verses

Indeed the one word Simman, hint, found at the end of the Megillah to remember how many verses are contained is the word: Penuel (פנואל). This word has the numeric value of 167, the exact number of verses. Reb Dovid Feinstein states that every one of these words stated in the mesorah at the end of a Torah portion, is not just a random word. Each word ties directly into the Torah ideas expressed within that work. What does this word show?

I suggest that the word Penuel means, “turn to Hashem”. This is the beautiful goal and lesson of the entire holy scroll. No further explanation is necessary!

May we all merit to tap into this powerful tool, and see how Hashem truly listens to us when we turn to Him. May we achieve true happiness through our faithfulness to Him every day.

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Hashkafah, Living Purim Every Day, Machshuvah Avodas Hashem, Tefillah

לקים עליהם להיות עושים את יום ארבעה עשר לחודש אדר ואת יום חמשה עשר בו בכל שנה ושנה (אסתר ט:כא).

“To celebrate on the fourteenth and fifteenth day of Adar every year” (Esther 9:21).

Why Variant Days?

Purim is a unique holiday! It is the only Yom Tov that depending upon where you live, there is a different day to celebrate. If you live in a city that was walled from the time of Yehoshua or if you live in Yerushalayim, then you celebrate on the fifteenth of Adar. If you live in any other city, your holiday is on the fourteenth. Why was it not established that there simply be one uniform day upon which everyone would celebrate? More so, even if your city celebrates on one day, both days are still partially celebrated by everyone! Why is this so? Why is this unique phenomena found specifically here? What is the lesson behind all this?

Why Twice?

Another question: The Gemara (Megillah 4a) tells us that one must hear the reading of the Megillah once at night and a second time during the day. Why is this the Halachah? On every other holiday we do not find that we have to perform the same ritual twice in one day? Do we blow the Shofar on Rosh HaShanah once at night and once at day? Do we shake the Lulav one time in the evening and once during the day? Even regarding Rabbinical ordinances, do we light the Menorah with a Berachah at night and day?! This Halachah needs to be understood! Why are we obligated to hear the Megillah twice?

A Conscience Mind

The verse states that “it is more productive to go to a house of mourning than to attend a joyous party… the living person will take it to heart” (Koheles 7:2). It was once asked to Reb Chaim Brisker that according to this verse, the greatest and most noble people should be the caretakers that perform burial for the dead and deal with death every day. This is the most powerful experience one can have! Why is this generally not the case then?! He answered them that this is for the same reason that the horses that the caretakers use to pull the hearse are also not great! The horse isn’t thinking about what it is doing and thus remains uninspired. Only when one takes the message of life to heart will it have an effect on him. The verse itself concludes that death is only an inspirational tool if “the life person takes it to heart”! Two people can witness the same event but how they grow from it and become greater is dependent upon how much they contemplate what they saw and learn a lesson from the experience.

What Does It Mean?

The Gemara (Berachos 32a) asks, if someone prayed and finds that his requests were not fulfilled, what should he do? The answer: He should pray again! This answer is quite perplexing, what is being said here? Is this the best advice that our sages can give us, “just try again”?!

Chazzaras HaShatz

The Vilna Goan shows how truly profound and relevant the answer is! This Gemara is hinting to a most powerful idea. When we daven in shul, we first daven the Shmoneh Esray by ourselves and after that it is repeated by the Chazzan. The Gemara tells us that the reason for this institution was because there were many people in the shul who did not know how to read and thus they had to listen to the Chazzan’s repetition to fulfill their obligation. However, nowadays, where this is not the case, why do we still do it? The Gra explains that our Gemara sheds light on this question. Chazal are stating that if one davened and was not answered in the silent Shmoneh Esray, then he should daven again by listening to the Chazan’s repetition and this will grant him the merit to be answered. The first time he prayed, his reliance in Hashem was that of “chochmah, knowledge”. He stated factually that Hashem is the provider of all his needs. It was a strong intellectual statement. Now, the second time he davens (by answering Amain to the Shatz’s prayers) he acknowledges the statements by answering “Amain, it is true”, this is “binah, contemplation”. It has become emotional. When he acknowledges even deeper in his heart that Hashem is the only source for wisdom, money, health and all of his needs, this will grant him the merit to be answered for these requests. Chazzaras HaShatz is the internalizing and contemplation process for bringing oneself closer to Hashem.

In Other Words

Indeed, the Mabit explains this Chazal in the very same way. He teaches us that the essence of prayer is not to let God know what you lack and thus desire, for He is well aware of what you have and what you need! So what then do we accomplish through our prayers? The answer is: Our objective is to recognize with full cognizance that only Hashem can provide us with our needs and wishes. In short, prayer is not intended ‘to tell God what you need’, it is rather: ‘to tell yourself that you need God’! Therefore, if one’s prayers seem not to have been answered, he must push himself more, to focus upon and internalize that Hashem is the only provider, thus making himself a more elevated person and more worthy now to receive what he needs. This is what Chazal are instructing us by “he should pray again”! This theme is parallel to the Gra’s explanation.

Back To Purim

This is the exact lesson of our double reading of the Megillah. When one reads it once, he gains knowledge, but when he reads it again it enters his heart! We read it twice to show that we desire to connect deeply and emotionally to recognizing Hashem’s guiding hand on our lives.

The Finishing Touch

What is left to explain is why do we only find this concept expressed here by the laws of Purim? Why am I required to specifically hear the Megillah twice in order to internalize its lesson, why don’t we find this by any other Torah portion or Mitzvah which also have many lessons worthy of internalization?

The answer is that this is the exact theme of Purim. The Jews reaccepted the Torah specifically because of the miracle of Purim. They came to the recognition that Hashem passionately loved them and thus they loved Him in return. Their miraculous salvation brought them limitless love and internalization of Hashem’s great care for them. This is the precise Yom Tov of deep contemplation, to the furthest degree! [Indeed, the Mitzvah of "Ad D'lo Yadah" finds root precisely in this idea as well, to be discussed be'ezras Hashem in a future article.]

Hence, when it comes to the Megillah, the scroll which reveals Hashem’s great orchestration of world events for our benefit, we repay Hashem by true contemplation and strive to deepen our connection to Hashem through repetition.

Two Days

Indeed, this is hinted very deeply in the fact that Purim is two days, the fourteenth and fifteenth of Adar. No other Yom Tov has two viable days. This is to show that the entire theme of the day is to extrapolate and internalize all of the beautiful messages that the Yom Tov has to offer us. The celebration was given the maximum length that could be justified. Indeed, the very first Mishnah in Meseches Megillah states that (in the time of the Mikdash) the Megillah could be read on any one of five possible days!

Penetrate The Heart

This is the approach of a true seeker of Hashem. Every day he strives to see and appreciate all that Hashem does for him! As he contemplates and internalizes the great kindness of Hashem, his heart is filled with love and excitement to grow higher and closer to his Maker.

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Hashkafah, Machshuvah Bein Adam LeMakom, Growth, Prayer, Tefillah, Wisdom

אשה כי תזריע וילדה זכר… (יב:ב).

“When a woman gives birth…” (12:2).

The Midrash Tanchuma paints a vivid picture of a woman in labor. “She screams one hundred shouts, the first ninety-nine are screams of death; the final yell connotes a new life that has just begun!” A question worth pondering, as I’m sure many have wondered, is the following. Why is birth proceeded by such a torturous process? I know that the following suggested thought can be taken two ways. For those who never thought about this (ie: men), it might not mean anything, and for women who experienced it, I may not do justice, but nevertheless, it is a Torah idea and thus worth sharing!

The rule of the world is that all valuable things are expensive. You cannot buy a real and precious diamond without paying a small fortune! If someone offers to sell one to you for an unbelievably low price, it must be a scam! Even if one steals a diamond, that pleasure must be paid for in the end when he gets caught and sits in jail! The way of the world is that anything worthwhile must be paid for.

A doctor will devise for someone a balanced diet and exercise regiment. One with foresight will heed to the suggestions and thereby maintain his health. The fool, on the other hand, will neglect his health and only recognize its importance when his body deteriorates and sickens, forcing him to change his habits. The formula is simple. Everything costs money. You can either pay before hand, by putting in the money or effort required, or one will suffer the unpleasant consequences of paying later!

R’ Shimshon Pincus zt”l teaches a beautiful lesson from the following story. The Russian government had placed high restrictions against performing business across their border. Some men got together to devise a plan on how to smuggle out expensive diamonds to make a huge profit. They brilliantly designed an infallible scheme by which to accomplish their directive. They would fill a genuine coffin with their goods and pretend to be a procession exiting the city to bury their dead. The government was happy to allow coffins to leave their sacred soil. The plan worked many times, until their show started to wane. As they were exiting the city, they were so proud of themselves and their ingenuously dubious scheme, that they tried to contain their laughter but to no avail. Immediately the guards saw that something was wrong. “Open the box now!” came the order. “Please,” they begged, “do not desecrate the honor of our dead, let us continue the funeral undisturbed!” “Liars!” the guard screamed as he ripped open the box to reveal their illegal activity. They just stood there pale-faced knowing the Siberia punishment that awaited them. The guard turned to them and made his biting remark, “if you would have been crying before, then you would be laughing now! You fools reversed the order!”

The message of the story is clear and strong. We can daven and cry to Hashem before problems arise (or worsen) and be happy in the undisturbed future, or we could wait for trouble to plague us and only then begin to pray!            The Gemara in Berachos (54a) tells us that, “one should thank Hashem for the past and beg His mercy to help him in the future!” Chazal also teach us, “one should always precede the troubles with prayer” (Sanhedrin 44b).

When a child is in the process of being created, Hashem gives the parents an opportunity to invest oceans of tears and prayers, to carry the child through life! One can then saturate their child with requests to Hashem for health, guidance and inspiration that will carry the child throughout his life and all of its challenges! “Those who plant with tears, will reap in happiness!” When one calls out to Hashem in true pain, this call can be channeled into the strongest type of prayer as it is so deeply and emotionally charged! Hashem gives the baby’s caretakers thousands of opportunities for preemptive prayers that will carry the child for a lifetime! This may be one idea behind the trying event ordeal and pains of pregnancy and labor. May we use all of our situations for growth and prayer!

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Parshas Tazria Investment, Labor, Prayer, Tefillah

We say everyday in our tefillos:

ברוך אלקינו שבראנו לכבודו והבדילנו מן התועים ונתן לנו תורת אמת וחיי עולם נטע בתוכינו. הוא יפתח לבנו בתורתו וישם בלבנו אהבתו ויראתו ולעשות רצונו ולעבדו בלבב שלם למען לא ניגע לריק ולא נלד לבהלה.

Since this is at the end of davenning it somehow gets caught being between Ashrai and Aleinu not given the proper attention it deserves. This is of course our fault not because of the order of the davenning. I don’t want to get too far off topic I would like to take this opportunity to turn our davenning up on notch.

Our tefillos were established in place of the Korban Tamid that was brought everyday as a protection to Klal Yisroel. Our tefillos were instituted in a way to allow us to represent ourselves in the sacrifices place. This is evident in our prayers, as they must be with complete devotion and must be performed in a certain way. The general concept of tefillah has many different parts to it but our tefillos are performed with three steps Shevach, Bekashah and, Hodah (Praise, Request, and Acknowledgement). This is as the great Chazal explain our entrance into the palace of the Almighty. First we walk in and prostrate ourselves to the greatness of Hashem^[1] then we ask for all of our needs^[2] then we acknowledge all the good that we have been given. It is this path of going up and back down that is also associated with the Karbonos. We don’t just give a sacrifice, you must go from chamber to chamber of the Beis HaMikdash going from one level to the next. The Siddur HaYavitz^[3] writes in his explanation of the tefillos that the procession of our tefillos go from one level to the next starting with Brachos going to Psukai D’zimrah going to Yishtabach and so on. We are raising ourselves to levels of kedushah as we finally enter the Kodesh HaKudushim the Shemonah Esrai which is the actual tefillah. I have already gone off on a tangent and will explain this at another time I just want to conclude this point by saying that the end of the davenning is the procession as we leave the palace of the Almighty. Is it not prohibited to take large steps away from a Beis Kenesis^[4]!? Then the way we leave our davenning also must be with care and kedushah.

Now that we can focus a little about the chashivus of our davenning from beginning until its conclusion maybe we can see the great lessons that we can learn from this. To give a loose translation of the test which is found after Ashrai at the end of Uva-L’tzion, Praised our Lord for he created us with honor and separated us from the wandering and gave us the Torah (in its written form) that has been instilled in our lives. He should opens our hearts with his Torah and puts on our hearts with his love and trepidation and to do the will of the Almighty wholeheartedly which is my we haven’t been affected by emptiness and out-poured into utter panic. This will be explained much clearer,but we have to start somewhere.

Boruch is very simply translated as “Praise” a similar word, however the Nefesh HaChaim points out that the Almighty doesn’t need our brachos in any way. If that is so, we come back to stage one why do we have brachos why do we have tefillah good, if this still bother you try looking here. We must say a brachah as a tool to praise the Almighty so he can give us a brachah (in that connotation it means the effect of the brachah as opposed to the words). This brachah is to acknowledge the greatness that we have been given called a Birchas Hodah. Unlike what we may think, the nature of the brachos are pure, the Shevach (Compliment) is unusual to us, as if a person is asking for something. So to a person will thank you for all you have done for them, right away we are wondering if there is something else I can do for this person as they have just reminded me of all the great deeds I have done to them. The tefillah is pure, it is the utmost praise and acknowledgement by not mixing them together. Therefore this brachah is not asking for continued salvation, rather it is the pure simcha of the realization of all that we have from Hashem.

What do we have? What is it that we are praising Hashem for day after day? That we were created for respect. Who’s respect? His respect. This is incredible we are praising Hashem for creating us little creatures of nothingness, we have no existence with him and what do we thank him for creating us to respect him!? This is so magnificent I cannot sit down while I write this, that all that we are here for is to provide the greatest kavod to  the Almighty! That is our essence and our goal in this world to provide Kavod Shaim Shemyaim. But why are we so happy about it!? Not only because of what it enables us to do in respect to the alternative lifestyle, rather because we were created with such a greatness that our lives are to provide kavod to the Almighty! We are the agents of the kavod of the Master of the Universe, he comes to us to spread his name around the world. How do we respond to this responsibility? With a brachah, a brachah for the source of our existence, that which gave purpose to our lives, that should make you feel like you are most special being in the world. Know, its true. This obligation makes us the reason for our existence and the reason for why there is an existence at all, to spread the kavod of Almighty.

The glorification of Hashem is both the foundation of our existence but also the reward. The difference between Torah V’Mitzvos more than anything is that by all other actions are motivated by its result. By Torah the action is the result! The spiritual growth that you go through in doing your holy duties are the most precious treasure that we have. This great reward is what gives us direction in our lives and separates us from all those who wander lost looking for some purpose in their lives. It is the nature of Man more than anything else to have a purpose and see its fruition. Whatever he finds to satisfy this seeking will be embrace with all his abilities. When he finds something more suitable or an expected difficulty he will suddenly drop everything and leap towards his newly discovered passion. It is the Torah that Hashem gave us והבדילנו מן התועים ונתן לנו תורה אמת חיי עולם נטע בתוכינו that has instilled our people for generations, nothing else. This is encapsulated by the statement of Rebbe Akiva^[5] that a Jew without Torah is like a fish out of water, it cannot survive.

The last part of this tefillah is by asking for aid in our observance of Torah. Please open our hearts to the Torah, both through ahavah and yirah. Then we will be able to serve Hashem completely. The words בלבב שלם literally means with a full heart, however the double beis has an added meaning. Chazal tell us in the pasuk in Krias Shema when we say ואהבת את ה’ אלקיך בכל לבבך וכו’ the double beis is coming to tell us that even with your Yetzer HaRa. This means that your tendency towards evil is present even in your worship is a tremendous leap. to change It is understood that every letter in our tefillos is with great depth and not only asking for our hearts to be opened toward doing Avodas Hashem, but even our Evil Inclination should! Meaning to say that is not limited to just our long term observance but even the short term. Though there its seems there may be different approaches to this matter, it seems that the great Alter of Slabodka was of the opinion that until the coming of the next era with Meshiach Tzidkaynu we cannot completely rid ourselves of the Yetzer HaRa. The internal war of good and evil though present and active is much more controlled and maintained. With that understanding I would like to suggest that we are not simply asking for the destruction of such an evil, rather that even it should be influence by Torah. This does not seem to be a simple concept, or one that I fully grasp. Regardless, I think that it is the mature Yetzer HaRa not to just to do against the Torah but to do its will for other reasons. This concept is known as Lo L’shmah or not for its calling. This is a innyin in itself that is out of the scope of this, but I believe it is the explanation of this tefillah. That is, we ask Hashem to please have the Torah open the depths of our heart. For what reason? If not we will be left with emptiness and panic, much of what we see today. The person who does not seek a life of Torah is left with a searching with no purpose and full of constant fear of all. It is the Torah, and it alone that may guide those who take its path to a life full of sanity and reason. Even to the extent that your internal conflicts are striving for great measures even though they are rooted by poor reasoning. It is much easier to do something for the wrong reason than to not do something for the right reason. It is that concept that sets a Torah life, to do the right actions even when its not done for the best of reasons. With the goal that through your continued Avodas Hashem you will be able to do things entirely in line with the Torah. It is this tefillah that was say everyday, with hope that our realization of how special we are. How we are created with a purpose that no one else can fill. How it is through this journey we take with the Torah guiding our way that separates us from all who ignore it. With that B’azer Hashem Yisborach we should all be zocheh to take steps forward with all of Klal Yisroel. Only following your path, and no one Else’s. To do all of it for the only valid reason of a true Eved Hashem. This is what makes up our lives, and this is what makes us have a Life. That realization alone can be a shield on our lives and bring Meshiach who is so close straight ahead in the path that we follow.

1. I’ll have to explain this some other time [↩]
2. This also needs explanation [↩]
3. A great Kabbilist [↩]
4. It is, says the gemara in Berachos 6b [↩]
5. Brachos 61b [↩]

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Hashkafah, Mussar Achdus, Brachos, Chashivas HaAdom, Karbonos, L'shma, Limud HaTorah, Shviras HaMidos, Tefillah

Says the pasuk in Tehillim “lev tahor bru li alokim v’ruach nachon b’kirbi”^[1] which comfortably translates as “Create a pure heart Hashem and spirit as new amongst me”. The point that needs emphasis is that Dovid HaMelech is asking Hashem not to simply change his heart but to create a new one that is tahor. This needs explanation which must first include mention of another topic pertaining to this issue. The difference between chidush and briah, chidush is the renewal of something that is already created. Briah is the creation of something that ceased to previously exist, therefore it is a considerably great difference to refer to the transformation of one’s heart from stages of impurity to purity to be treated as an entirely new entity. This is the great lesson that separates Man from everything else in the World, the choice of progression.

In our tefillos we all begin with the request to give us the strength to even begin our tefillah, meaning without it we would lack the ability to do so. It is the power of tefillah that enables us to request the abilities to carry out the will of Hashem, and that tefillah is so great that we must even request the strength to make this tefillah. It is clear that through the endless kindness that Hashem bestows upon us why must be ask to ask? This is presuming it is clear why we must ask with our tefillos from the beginning, and of course why we must do anything and it not handed right to us. As with everything, there is a reason, and it is always because that is the best thing for us. We must do Mitzvos for the most basic reason since we are obligated to do so. The great Rav Mordechai Gifter zt”l used to always quote the Sefer HaChinuch saying that the expression Taamay HaMitzvah accurately translates as the taste of the mitzvah, and he explained that one eats food for its sustenance not for its taste. Therefore the reason we do mitzvos is because it is vital for us to do as that is the g’zayrah (decree) of the Melech, and the taste alone is an independent inspiration. It is the Taamay HaMitzvah that comes along with the actual mitzvah that is unquestionably intended for out experience by observance of the mitzvah. It is that taste that we derive great benefit in seeing how far a single act goes and grasping a greater sense of the kindness that is endlessly poured upon us.

The great Rambam writes in his Mishnah Torah^[2] that the mitzvah of vidoy on Yom HaKippurim begins prior to the onset of the evening before you eat, because of the possibility that you will choke before you are misvadeh. The question that troubles me is why is it that we are more concerned about choking then and not always!? In my opinion the simple reason is because there is a greater expression of Midas HaDin at that time more than others. If we lived our lives in a constant panic with the fear that the next moment all that we have could be taken from us, we would be a wreck. I thought that has always been dear to me is “A Life of fear is not a Life, a Life without fear is Death, rather you must live Life with fear”. That means that fear must accompany your actions but must not be solely guided by them at all times, because it cannot exist in such a condition. This is clear from Chazal that state that the World was originally created with the Midas HaDin but Hashem saw that it could not stand, rather only din can exist under the cover of Ahavah. That Ahavah is what we are constantly embracing when we have no zchusim, we aren’t worthy of anything. The great chesed of Hashem is apparent as He finds favor upon us, even when we have consciously went against his ways. This chesed is that second before choose for the good, or for the worse it is that chesed that enables us to even have to ability to choose bad and be allowed to carry it out. It is the greatest chesed of the Free-Will that has been established in this world, that even the actions that we do that are seemingly horrific and against our very existence, it is the chesed that enables us to be able to choose to act and be accountable for our actions.

1. Tehilim, 51, 12 [↩]
2. Teshuvah, 2, 7 [↩]

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Hashkafah Shviras HaMidos, Tefillah