Close To Torah

One of my favorite aspects about Sefer Shemos is that any Dvar Torah said about the parsha can be used at the Pesach Seder as well since the themes are the same! That being said, I hope that you enjoy this Parsha and Pesach thought. The beauty of it is that it really applies at all time.

One of the recurring ideas expressed regarding the Korban Pesach is that one needed to be counted as part of a group in order to partake of the obligation to eat the Pesach offering. If an antisocial person was to not want to join a group and wished instead to simply form his own “group” and bring his own lamb, this was prohibited as one was not allowed to leave over any meat past Chatzos and eating an entire lamb on one’s own is an impossibility.

Why was it set up this way? One of the most important and powerful aspects of the Exodus was the formation of the unified Jewish Nation. The Jews were encouraged to come together as one unit. This was the prerequisite for Shavuos and the acceptance of the Torah which followed fifty days after the Exodus. The Torah describes the Jews at Sinai as being united, “like one person with one heart (see Rashi Shemos 19:2).”

Being part of a group created a certain bond and empowerment. Many companies and political parties start clubs for youths to give them an affiliation and relationship with the party so that when they grow older and have the choice, they will stay with that specific group. There is a lure and magic in being a part of a larger group. I have found that when I travel internationally many Jews who otherwise would not talk to me or wish to socialize with me on mainland, are lured to me and wish to be with me in the airports and foreign countries. We all deeply strive to be connected to something bigger and greater.

The purpose of the Korban Pesach was not to torture the man suffering from social-phobia by forcing him to be part of a group, rather it was meant to unite the nation and instill a feeling of Jewish patriotism. Indeed, in the Plague of Darkness, one of the descriptions of the darkness is expressed as (Shemos 10:23), “no one saw his friend.” This is not just a technical detail; it is a significant part of the punishment. During Darkness each Egyptian felt isolated and separated from his nation. They were stopping the Jews from being a united nation and so they were punished with exact repayment until they let us free. The Gemara (Chagigah 9a) describes the opportunity to join a group doing a Mitzvah as an irreplaceable experience that can never be made up. The privilege of joining a group of people growing together and serving Hashem is the most powerful experience.

We begin the Pesach Seder by inviting all those in need of a meal to please join us. The entire theme of Pesach is to care about others. We collect money for those in need for the weeks before Pesach and we work towards Shavuos by striving to treat our acquaintances with the respect that they deserve, as we painfully learned from the sin of the student of Rebbe Akiva who died because of their lack of respect for others (Yevamos 62b). With a positive affiliation with the rest of the Jewish Nation we are in a position to grow and become the greatest that we can be.

Tehillim (Psalms) is perhaps one of the most universal books throughout the world. Men, women and children of all ages and faiths find comfort, meaning and expression through its recitation. King David is most famous for his authorship of Sefer Tehillim. The Midrash (Yalkut Shimoni Mishlei 929) points out a most fascinating observation. Tehillim begins with the first letter of the Hebrew alphabet: Alef (“Ashrei HaIsh”) and the last verse ends with the middle letters of Chof and Lamed (“Kol HaNishamah”). Shlomo HaMelech, the great son of David took a varied approach. He began Sefer Mishlei with the letter Mem (“Mishlei”) which is the middle letter that follows Chof and Lamed and he ended the last verse with the letter Taf (“Tenu Lah”) when he completed the Aishes Chayil song (Chapter 31) with the last letter in the Hebrew alphabet. What does this all mean?

The Midrash (ibid.) states that there is a philosophical dispute between two rabbinic scholars as to where wisdom is located. Rebbe Eliezer holds that it is in the head (intellect) and Rebbe Yehoshua holds that it is in the heart (emotions). The Midrash states that the letter Alef represents wisdom which is located in the head at the top of one’s body just like Alef is the top letter, whereas the letter Mem represents the heart as it is the middle of the alphabet and thus corresponds to the heart which is located in the middle of one’s body. King David started Tehillim with the letter Alef because he held that wisdom is in the mind (Alef) and King Shlomo stated Mishlei with the letter Mem because he held that wisdom is in the heart (Mem). This is the complete Midrash, yet it appears to be a total enigma and counterintuitive. I would have thought that David and Shlomo would have the exact opposite views?! David’s Tehillim are heart-wrenching outpourings of emotion and feeling and seem to emanate directly from his heart, not his mind, and Shlomo’s proverbs are brilliant intuitive musings that seem to clearly emanate from his mind and not the heart?!

The explanation is that in truth both components make up true wisdom. There must be intellect and there must be heart. The argument is simply which is more important. When Shlomo requested wisdom from Hashem he specifically asked to have “a listening heart to be able to properly judge the nation (Melachim I 3:9).” Shlomo did not want to become a heartless robot who ruled without feelings. He certainly needed wisdom in his mind, but he made sure that his wisdom included heart and understanding for others as well. King David was the essence of heart and love. He uses the word Lev, heart, repeatedly throughout Tehillim; he proclaims (Tehillim 9:2) “I will praise Hashem with all my heart!” He was filled with passion, emotion and heart. But his heart did not throw him off. With all of his emotions and deep longings, he remained grounded and rational and was able to exercise his intellect as well. He knew that sometimes Hashem would not heed to his requests. He would pour out his heart and beg Hashem for things, but he knew intellectually that ultimately Hashem knows what is best for him. He would then incorporate this into his emotion and grow even closer to Hashem. King David introduced the concept of “no tear goes unnoticed and unanswered by Hashem,” sometimes the tears accumulate and sometimes they are applied elsewhere, but they are always heard. “Place my tears in your flask and account for them (Tehillim 56:9).”

When we study Tehillim, we can greatly benefit by using our hearts and minds. Tehillim is filled with heart-warming hope and prayer and deep cries for help and comfort from Hashem. Tehillim is saturated with both intellectual and emotional gems. May we merit to learn Sefer Tehillim together with a focus on the beautiful and powerful lessons that stir our hearts and minds and that deeply uplift our souls.

One of the most integral themes of the Parsha is the Ten Plagues with which Egypt was smitten. What is fascinating to note is the fact that all ten of them are not contained in one Parsha. Rather, the first 7 are found in Va’eira and the last 3 are in next week’s Parshas Bo. It is well known that the Gematria, numerical value, of Bo (Beis Alef) is three and the Gematria of the first two letters of Va’eira (Vav Alef) is seven hinting to the number of Makos that each Parsha contains. What needs to be understood is why the Makos are split up between two Parshios?

Rabbi Gedalia Schorr (1910-79) poses this question in Sefer Ohr Gidalyahu. He explains based on the Zohar that the Ten Makos correspond to the Aserah Maamaros, Ten Utterances with which Hashem created the world (See Avos 5:1). Hashem’s world is one in which His presence and control are meant to be recognized and acknowledged by His subjects and the recipients of His Kindness. When evil people do not follow Hashem’s Will, they are so to speak denying the sovereignty of Hashem and in effect denying that He created the world. The Egyptians were the world power and a nation that set the tone for moral decadence. They were steeped in all sorts of evil actions including idolatry, promiscuousness, black-magic and the abuse of other nations. They were in effect denying Hashem’s existence and living life according to their personal desires. The Ten Makos came to establish Hashem as the Unlimited Ruler and True Creator of the world. Each of the Ten Makos corresponded to one of the Ten Maamaros in reverse order. The Makos showed that Hashem controlled the world and was watching over all of its details. The Makos reestablished the Ten Utterances of creation by slowly reestablishing each one in backwards order.

The first Makah was Dam, Blood, this corresponded to the last Maamer of “Let us make man (Bereishis 1:26).” Man is seen as comprised of Dam (which is the root of Adam) which is his life-force and vitality (see Vayikra 17:11). The last three Makos of Locust, Darkness and Death to Firstborns corresponded to the first three Maamaros. The first Maamer was “Bereishis, let there be a Beginning (See Rosh HaShana 32a)” and thus corresponded to the death of the first borns of Egypt. The second Maamar was “let there be light” and thus corresponded to Darkness. The third Maamar was “let there be a firmament which separates the upper waters from the lower ones (Berieshis 1:6).” This corresponds to Locust which covered the entire sky and blocked out the sun (See Shemos 10:5) thus causing another separation between the earth and the sky.

The Seforim write that the Ten Makos and Ten Maamaros also correspond to the Ten Sefiros. The first three Sefiros are those of the mind and the last seven are those of the heart and body. Accordingly, Chochma, Binah and Daas refer to Locust, Darkness and Death to Firstborns. Chesed, Gevurah, Tiferes, Netzach, Hod and Yesod refer to Blood, Frogs, Lice, Beasts, Pestilence, Boils and Hail. The Seforim explain that the goal of the human being is to use his intellect (the top three traits) and to connect that knowledge to his body (the bottom seven, physical application). In English, this simply means to apply our knowledge into action and not to let the body and ego rule. The sin of the Egyptians was that they separated their knowledge from their bodies and allowed their own egos to rule them. The place where the head (intellect) meets the body (earthy lusts) is at the neck. This is the place of resistance to truth. One who doesn’t follow Hashem is called a “stiff necked and stubborn” person. The letters that make up Pharaoh (פרעה) also rearrange to spell “the neck (הערף).” The Ten Makos are split up in order to stress the reason that the Egyptians were getting punished. They had separated the three traits of intellect (Parshas Bo) from the seven traits of action (Va’eira). They had denied Hashem’s power and rulership and thus Hashem set them straight. Indeed, the word Va’eira refers to seeing, in this case seeing truth and the word Bo means “to come” referring to movement based on truth. May we all merit learn truth and apply it to our lives in a most rewarding and beautiful way.

פרשת וארא

Mind Over Matter

One of the most integral themes of the Parsha is the Ten Plagues with which Egypt was smitten. What is fascinating to note is the fact that all ten of them are not contained in one Parsha. Rather, the first 7 are found in Va’eira and the last 3 are in next week’s Parshas Bo. It is well known that the Gematria, numerical value, of Bo (Beis Alef) is three and the Gematria of the first two letters of Va’eira (Vav Alef) is seven hinting to the number of Makos that each Parsha contains. What needs to be understood is why the Makos are split up between two Parshios?

Rabbi Gedalia Schorr (1910-79) poses this question in Sefer Ohr Gidalyahu. He explains based on the Zohar that the Ten Makos correspond to the Aserah Maamaros, Ten Utterances with which Hashem created the world (See Avos 5:1). Hashem’s world is one in which His presence and control are meant to be recognized and acknowledged by His subjects and the recipients of His Kindness. When evil people do not follow Hashem’s Will, they are so to speak denying the sovereignty of Hashem and in effect denying that He created the world. The Egyptians were the world power and a nation that set the tone for moral decadence. They were steeped in all sorts of evil actions including idolatry, promiscuousness, black-magic and the abuse of other nations. They were in effect denying Hashem’s existence and living life according to their personal desires. The Ten Makos came to establish Hashem as the Unlimited Ruler and True Creator of the world. Each of the Ten Makos corresponded to one of the Ten Maamaros in reverse order. The Makos showed that Hashem controlled the world and was watching over all of its details. The Makos reestablished the Ten Utterances of creation by slowly reestablishing each one in backwards order.

The first Makah was Dam, Blood, this corresponded to the last Maamer of “Let us make man (Bereishis 1:26).” Man is seen as comprised of Dam (which is the root of Adam) which is his life-force and vitality (see Vayikra 17:11). The last three Makos of Locust, Darkness and Death to Firstborns corresponded to the first three Maamaros. The first Maamer was “Bereishis, let there be a Beginning (See Rosh HaShana 32a)” and thus corresponded to the death of the first borns of Egypt. The second Maamar was “let there be light” and thus corresponded to Darkness. The third Maamar was “let there be a firmament which separates the upper waters from the lower ones (Berieshis 1:6).” This corresponds to Locust which covered the entire sky and blocked out the sun (See Shemos 10:5) thus causing another separation between the earth and the sky.

The Seforim write that the Ten Makos and Ten Maamaros also correspond to the Ten Sefiros. The first three Sefiros are those of the mind and the last seven are those of the heart and body. Accordingly, Chochma, Binah and Daas refer to Locust, Darkness and Death to Firstborns. Chesed, Gevurah, Tiferes, Netzach, Hod and Yesod refer to Blood, Frogs, Lice, Beasts, Pestilence, Boils and Hail. The Seforim explain that the goal of the human being is to use his intellect (the top three traits) and to connect that knowledge to his body (the bottom seven, physical application). In English, this simply means to apply our knowledge into action and not to let the body and ego rule. The sin of the Egyptians was that they separated their knowledge from their bodies and allowed their own egos to rule them. The place where the head (intellect) meets the body (earthy lusts) is at the neck. This is the place of resistance to truth. One who doesn’t follow Hashem is called a “stiff necked and stubborn” person. The letters that make up Pharaoh (פרעה) also rearrange to spell “the neck (הערף).” The Ten Makos are split up in order to stress the reason that the Egyptians were getting punished. They had separated the three traits of intellect (Parshas Bo) from the seven traits of action (Va’eira). They had denied Hashem’s power and rulership and thus Hashem set them straight. Indeed, the word Va’eira refers to seeing, in this case seeing truth and the word Bo means “to come” referring to movement based on truth. May we all merit learn truth and apply it to our lives in a most rewarding and beautiful way.

We have gone through and learned the lessons of each verse in Aishes Chayil. Now what? One question that I have struggled to understand is how are we to view the Aishes Chayil’s greatness… We state, “you surpass them all” (in Letter Reish). Are we stating that the Aishes Chayil is better and greater than all of the noble women throughout Jewish history? Let us explore this.

The Gemara (Berachos 64a) tells us that Tzaddikim have no rest in this world and in Olam HaBah, the future world of reward. The greatest gift and pleasure is understanding Hashem’s Wisdom and Torah. The Tzaddikim will continue to grow and delight in Torah for eternity (Ramchal). The human mind cannot fully fathom what this means but we can understand that Hashem wishes to give all of us the greatest pleasure in the world. The Gemara (Berachos 17a) describes the Tzaddikim in Olam HaBah as, “the righteous sit with their crowns on their heads and delight in the shine of the Shechina.” Interestingly, a similar phraseology is found in the verse in Mishlei (12:4), which states “The Aishes Chayil is the crown of her husband.” In fact, the Vilna Goan (Mishlei ibid.) ties these two crowns together. The crown represents royalty and mastery. The king and queen wear a crown to show their elevated stature. They are above all the rest of the people. It is no coincidence that a crown is worn on the head. True authority and respect is only earned through the development of the mind which controls one’s outlook and the way that he or she interacts with and treats others. The Aishes Chayil elevates her husband and helps him fulfil the Shabbos song, “D’aye Chachma L’Nafshecha, V’Hi Keser L’Roshechah, acquire Torah knowledge in your heart and it serves as a crown upon your head.” She elevates her husband just as Torah elevates those that connect with it.

We have quoted from the Vilna Goan that the name “Aishes Chayil” contains the letters, “חיל, Valor” which equal 48 numerically. The Mishna (Avos 4:13 and 6:6) states that there are three crowns, Kehunah, Malchus and Torah. The crown of Kehunah has 24 benefits, that of Malchus has 30, and that of Torah has 48 (as enumerated in the Mishna). The Vilna Goan points out that the Aishes Chayil is deeply committed to growth in Torah and thus is called Chayil which has the numerical value of 48 and is also comprised of the letters: חיל which break up into ,חי + ל (18 + 30). This hints to the fact that Malchus is higher than Kehunah in that it has 30 benefits and Torah is higher than Malchus in that it has 18 more benefits, totaling 48. The Aishes Chayil has tremendous greatness.

The ultimate praise is that she works hard to be the best person that she could be. She does not remain complacent and simply rest on her laurels. She certainly does not try to outdo others. She does not pretend to be the most righteous woman to have ever lived since our Matriarch Sarah. Rather “V’at Alis al Kulana, you surpass them all,” she is committed to the quest to surpass her own self. To build and to grow further every day, to be a better person than who she was yesterday. This is how the Aishes Chayil lives her life. She is a healthy and normal human being who has challenges and off days. While at that same time her focus is on trying her best, connecting with Hashem and being a living example to her husband and children in how to grow and develop more and more each day. The journey to greatness and true beauty and fulfillment continues throughout all of her life. With all of her beauty and wisdom, the most praiseworthy and special part about her is her passion for growth and continued development. She knows what life is all about… she is a true Bas Yisrael, a true role model… a true Aishes Chayil!

Parshas Shemos begins the story of the Exodus and how Hashem saved the Jews from Egypt with great miracles and lessons culminating with their establishment as the Jewish Nation and receiving the Torah. Rashi (Shemos 1:1) states that the Torah lists off the names of the Jewish people in order to show Hashem’s love and endearment towards them. Even though they were counted earlier, never-the-less Hashem listed them off here again to show how precious they are to Him. This is one of the most fundamental aspects of the entire establishments of the Jewish nation as we shall explain.

Avos (1:14) states that Hillel used to say, “If I am not for myself, who will be?!, but when I am only for myself and not others, what am I worth?!, if not now, then when?” What does this mean and how does the last phrase about not procrastinating have to do with the first part of the statement about caring for oneself and others? The commentators explain that each one of the maxims endorsed by the rabbis in Pirkei Avos was an expression of his specific life mission and credo. Hillel was known for his love and patience when dealing with others (See Shabbos 31a). The Torah recognizes the personal needs of each individual. This is why we are taught (Bava Metzia 62a), “your life precedes that of others when you can only save one person.” Chazal (Bereishis Rabbah 14:9) tell us that our soul has five names, Nefesh, Ruach, Neshamah, Chayah and Yechidah.” Each name represents a different and higher aspect of the soul. The last two represent the highest levels of human achievement. Chayah refers to the life vitality and eternity of the soul (ibid.) and Yechidah means “individualism” which refers to the greatest and deepest achievement of human growth. The peak of human achievement is to be in touch with oneself in a most deep and meaningful way; it represents the self-knowledge and self-mastery of a true great person. The study of Torah is intended to specifically bring out this recognition and accomplishment and not to negate individual creativity as many unfortunately think.

On the other hand, with such a strong focus on the self comes a danger that one will forget about his or her surroundings and fellow people. Thus, the Torah stresses the unity and power of Klal Yisrael as a nation. Throughout Shemos the Jews came together and were united until they were able to stand at Sinai “like one person with one unified heart (Mechilta Shemos).” That is how Torah is lived. This explains the statement of Hillel which focused on one’s foremost responsibility towards himself and then towards one’s fellow man. One may hear this dichotomy and be very confused. How can I focus on myself and others as well. Thus, Hillel concludes with a statement regarding the importance of time. One may think that I am not interested in helping others, why should I work to make them feel good and have their needs met. Hillel reminds us that life is limited and has a very specific purpose which is to grow in spirituality. Part of this is breaking the ego and learning to care about others. Hillel is encouraging us to find life and enjoyment in the pursuit of loving our neighbor and caring for his or her needs. Shemos is the story of the Jewish Nation but even more strongly it comes to stress the power of self-mastery and individual growth. Hashem counted each name by itself to show His interest in each individual’s growth. With this focus and commitment one is able to be a proud part of the Jewish Nation.

The Vilna Goan states that the verse of Letter Ayin refers to some of the Jewish holidays. “עוֹז וְהָדָר לְבוּשָׁהּ וַתִּשְֹחַק לְיוֹם אַחֲרוֹן, Strength and majesty are her dress; she joyfully laughs about the last day.” ‘Strength’ refers to Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur where Hashem’s power is shown and recognized in the world. ‘Hadar, majesty,’ refers to “Pri Etz Hadar, a beautiful Esrog fruit (Vayikara 23:40).” ‘She joyfully laughs about the last day’ refers to Shmini Atzeres and Simchas Torah a day of utter joy and “only happiness (Devarim 16:15).” What is going on here and why is it hinted to in the verses about the Woman of Valor?

Succos is the culmination of the Yamim NoRa’im and the Jewish New Year. Its purpose is to help incubate and concretize all of the beautiful inspiration that we picked up throughout Elul and Tishrei.  By going into the Succah we put our faith into action and remember how Hashem took care of the Jews in the desert by means of His clouds of glory and fire. Succos is a time of introspection and deepening of our commitment to serve Hashem properly. Anything that we do inside the Succah becomes a Mitzvah. When we eat, sleep, spend time with friends and family under the Succah shade, we have fulfilled a positive Torah command with ease. This is amazing. We learn that all of our actions can be elevated and done for the sake of Heaven. When we sleep so that we will be healthy and eat with a thought about taking care of our bodies so that we can serve Hashem with vigor, we have elevated the mundane world to its true spiritual purpose (See Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chayim 231). Succos teaches us just how to do this. When we contemplate the lesson of Succos we are inspired and recognize that Hashem has given us a most beautiful and special opportunity to transform every moment of our lives into eternity and connection to Him. We burst forth with joyous singing and reach the stage of “only happiness” of Simchas Torah.

The Aishes Chayil lives life with this focus and deep recognition. She teaches her children how to elevate the mundane. She shows them by example how to daven and how to make Berachos. When she says Birchas HaMazone she elevates the entire meal to a feast and banquet with Hashem as the Guest of Honor. She thanks Him for all of her blessings that he gave her. This is why Succos and Simchas Torah are hinted to specifically in this verse. The Aishes Chayil lives life with a focus on spirituality and thus can laugh with ease at her final day. She knows that she has elevated her life and her actions to be in line with the Will of Hashem. She has built a year-round Succah where the warm of Torah and Mitzvos and the joy of spiritual growth are contagious.

Yaakov Aveinu wished to ensure that even after his death his children would follow in the ways of the Torah. He gathered them together and suddenly lost his Ruach HaKodesh and the ability to tell them prophetically about the End of Days. He thought that perhaps one of them was incomplete with Hashem just as Avraham and Yitzchok had each bore one unworthy child (Yishmael and Esav) but they reassured him that “Shema Yisrael, listen our dear father Yisrael, Hashem is one.” At that time Yaakov responded with the phrase “Baruch Shem K’Vod Malchuso L’Olam V’Ed, blessed is Hashem’s kingdom forever” (see Pesachim 56a). This Gemara explains the connection between the first verse of Shema and the second phrase of Baruch Shem which we always say together in prayer.

The Gemara (ibid.) continues to ask why we only whisper the phrase of Baruch Shem when we say Shema in prayer. When Moshe wrote down the verses of Shema he omitted Baruch Shem, thus really we too should not say it. However, since Yaakov himself said it, we whisper it quietly. What in the world does this mean? To compound this issue, the Gemara gives a parable that is meant to clarify the entire matter which seems to only add to the enigma: There was once a princess who smelled a delicious aroma emanating from the kitchen. She asked her butler to bring her some of that dish. When he got to the kitchen he saw that it was not a royal meal being prepared for the king and his family but rather it was a private dish that the king’s servants has made for themselves. The butler reasoned that it would be disrespectful to present it to the princess for it was food of the simpletons, but on the other hand she asked for it and so he had to sneak her a portion without any fanfare. What is being said here? How and why does this relate to the phrase of Baruch Shem?!

Rabbi Chaim Volozhin (1749-1821, Nefesh HaChaim III:11) explains the depth here. The first verse of Shema establishes Hashem’s Unity and Perfection, there is nothing else to add to this. It states that Hashem is Intrinsically Perfect. Any further words would simply subtract. Hashem is the ultimately Perfect and Unified Being. Baruch Shem talks about Hashem’s rulership of the entire universe including earth and us His subjects. Imagine if a servant stood before the king and wished to make a request. He would begin by saying praises and recounting the King’s greatness. He would mention the King’s power, wealth, greatness and perfection. How would it sound if he would say, “You are the king of one million ant hills, one hundred thousand termite mounds and five million bird nests.” This may be true and that may be a part of his kingdom, but it is terribly disrespectful. It is the same thing with our mentioning of the praise of Hashem. When we say Shema Yisrael we are telling over the Perfection and Unity of God, this is the greatest praise. But when we say Baruch Shem we are referring to His kingdom of planets and earth, things that pale in comparison to His Intrinsic Greatness. We are talking about earth which compared to Hashem is a huge anthill!

So why do we mention it? Yaakov taught his children that Hashem in His Greatness and Infinite Wisdom created us to be His subjects and therefore He loves and cares for us. Although we are lowly in comparison to His Greatness, He put us here in order to serve Him, and praise Him and grow close to Him. That is the greatest pleasure to Him. This is truth was part of the revelation of Yaakov regarding the end of days. Ramchal (Taas Tevunos) explains that the more lowly and dark the world gets, the greater the revelation of Hashem’s rulership is manifest. Yaakov taught us that our job is to elevate our lowly state and to bring holiness and Hashem’s presence down on earth.

The Aishes Chayil song listed so many of the great gifts that Hashem bestows upon her and those that keep the Torah. She was blessed with: a spouse, children, health, success, nice clothing, beauty, wealth, charity, trust, love and so much more. Yet the Aishes Chayil is known to be modest and easy to get along with. How does she live life with so many blessings and not let it get to her head?

There is a story told regarding Margaret Thatcher as she began her term as Prime Minister (of the United Kingdom from 1979 to 1990). She was invited by the Queen of England to a private party. Eager to make a good impression, she went out and had the most magnificent and expensive blue dress made for her. She arrived at the party with great excitement and feeling very proud. Suddenly, her worst nightmare became a reality. The Queen was wearing the exact same dress as she was. She panicked and feared that her dress would be considered a deep insult against the Queen. Laying low and trying not to attract attention she left the party as quietly and quickly as she could. When she got home her heart was pounding as she wrote her sincere and heartfelt apology to the Queen. “I genuinely apologize for this terrible insult. It was truly unintentional. I have resolved to find out what the Queen will be wearing to future events so that my mistake will never be repeated again…” Immediately, she used her political connections and got the letter over to the secretary of the Queen. She waited anxiously for the reply. Her mind raced with all types of doubts about her future political career that hanged on the line. The secretary wrote back a one sentence reply: “The Queen never notices what anyone else is wearing- she’s the Queen!”

This idea finds root in Jewish thought. The Gemara in Shabbos (59b) discusses women wearing jewelry on Shabbos and talks about an expensive neck piece called, ‘The Golden Jerusalem’. One opinion states that it is considered an ornament and thus a woman cannot wear it outside on Shabbos as she may come to take it off to show it off to her friends and will be carrying without an Eruv. Rabbi Eliezer states that she is allowed to wear it outside on Shabbos. He explains that only a prominent lady (“Isha Chashuva”) would wear such a piece and “prominent women have no need to take off their jewelry to show to others!”

The Aishes Chayil has a deep-rooted sense of intrinsic value. She doesn’t do things because of what others will think. She doesn’t buy things so that others will look and feel jealous. She gets dressed in clothing befitting of a true Bas Yisrael Queen and she enjoys the bounty that Hashem gives her with a focus on appreciation towards Hashem for giving her precious blessings and without a thought of haughtiness and pride or superiority over others. She has a focus on internal value and thus she is modest and pleasant in her treatment of others. She is a truly prominent woman with a healthy self-esteem that is built from internal satisfaction and joy.

Every Jewish person blesses his sons that they should be like Efraim and Menasheh. We do this because Yaakov Aveinu so instructed (see Berieshis 48:20). The Jewish girls on the other hand are blessed that they should be like Sarah, Rivkah, Rachel and Leah (see Rus 4:11), the Matriarchs. Why do we specifically use Efraim and Menasheh as the male blessing of choice?

The Midrash (Tanchumah Vayigash 5) tells us that as Yosef HaTzaddik was speaking to his brothers after they brought Binyomin down to him in Egypt, he was overcome with emotion. Yosef felt that he could not keep his brothers in suspense any longer and he needed to reveal the true identity of Tzafnas Pane’ach to them. Yehuda and all of the brothers were highly riled up and were ready to destroy the entire Egypt in order to save Binyomin. Yosef was unable to contain himself further. He sent out all of the Egyptians and his guards and had a private talk with his eleven brothers. “I am Yosef!! Is my father still alive?!” It was an earth-shattering revelation. The Midrash states that Yosef gambled his life at that moment by sending out his guards and remaining alone with the brothers as they could have killed him on the spot and no one would have even known! So why did he do this? “Yosef said, ‘It is worth it for me to risk my life (to send out the guards) rather than to causing my brothers embarrassment when I reveal myself’!”

If we think about what is being said here it is quite awesome and unbelievable. Yosef was sold into slavery in Egypt by his brothers. For 22 years he missed his dear father, brother, homeland and freedom. He could have harbored bad feelings and allowed his internal resentments and hatred towards his brother who sold him to snowball into a ferocious loathing of them. Yet at this very moment of truth, he was willing to put his life on the line in order to save them from embarrassment. How was this possible?

I have noted the fascinating advent of the naming of Yosef’s two sons who were born to him in Egypt. “Yosef called his firstborn ‘Menasheh’ for Hashem has helped me forget (Nashani) my sorrows and the pain that my brothers caused me. He called the second one Efraim, for Hashem has made me productive (Hifrani) in this land of affliction” (Bereishis 41:51-2). Yosef could have spent the day wallowing in self-pity and victimhood. He could have used his troubles as an excuse as to why he was not capable of moving on and living a healthy, happy and productive life. But he did not. Yosef realized that the only person that he would be hurting by holding onto resentments was he himself. He would not accomplish or grow that way. And so he worked deeply and hard to let go. He put himself fully in Hashem’s hand and recognized that Hashem would help him forget his sorrows and pain. After he did this he experienced a deep inner freedom and empowerment. He would be a healthy and productive person. He would work to make that happen. This is signified by his two son’s names. Menasheh connotes that Yosef forgot and let go of his resentments. Efraim connotes that he thereby became a successful and productive person.

Yosef broke away from the role of victim that he easily could have fallen into and instead he choose the path of greatness. Yosef so strongly worked on himself to forgive and forget the pain caused by his brothers to the point that when he faced them, he looked at them with great love and respect. He was sensitive to their needs and he wished to ensure that they would not be exposed in public. He put his life on the line to make that happen. This is why we bless our children to be like Efraim and Menasheh. We wish for every Jew to learn how to let go of pain and resentment (Menasheh) and instead to be as productive and fruitful (Efraim) as possible!

Chanukah is a celebration of the Jewish individual as part of the collective whole. It is fascinating to note that the word ילד, child, is comprised of the same letters as the word דלי, bucket. What does this mean and what does it have to do with Chanukah!?

Chazal tell us that Yaakov Aveinu fought with Eisav’s administering angel and was punched on his thigh (sciatic nerve). The verse states: “When the angel saw that he could not win, he punched Yaakov in his כף ירחו, thigh (Berieshis 22:26).” Yaakov had been left alone that night as he had forgotten “פחים קטנים, small vessels (Ibid. 22:25).” What was the nature of these small vessels that Yaakov felt they were so vital to risk his safety to retrieve them?

It is fascinating to note that the words “כף ירחו, his thigh” directly tie into Chanukah. The word כף can be inverted to spell פך, jug (of oil) which is the exact word used in the Gemara (Shabbos 21b) when describing the Chanukah miracle. “The Jew defeated the Greeks and found one pach shemen, pure jug of oil, that was still intact and sealed by the Kohen Gadol. They cleaned up the Beis HaMikdash and lit the Menorah. Also, the word yerech, thigh is used in the context of the Menorah as the verse states (Shemos 25:31) “the thigh of the Menorah.”

The Midrash explains that the evil angel hit Yaakov below the belt as a sign that he would weaken and attempt to infiltrate his future descendants. This is exactly what happened when the Greeks took over the Beis HaMikdash and put up a statue of Zeus in the holy site and brought pigs up on the altar. One third of the Jewish people were not able to withstand the pressures of Greek attacks and became Hellinized Jews. It was only when Matisyahu and his great sons stood up and fought off the Greeks that the Jews finally got back their independence.

The purpose of education is to teach the child to be an independent and autonomous person who is connected to truth and to the service of Hashem. The word yeled (child) is comprised of the same letters as de’li (bucket) to show the importance of training a child to seek to find truth and answers from within. As the verse in Mishlei (20:5) states, “Counsel if like deep water in the heart of man; the man of understanding will draw it out (ידלנה).” Chanukah emanates from the word חינוך, education. The verse in Mishlei (22:6) states, “ חנוך לנער על פי דרכו גם כי יזקין לא יסור ממנה, educate the child according to his skills in a way that the teachings will remain with him when he ages.” The word Chanoch (educate) relates to Chanukah and stresses the importance of education. The word נער, child, is comprised of three letters. The first letter נ, is numerically equal to 50 and hints to the fifty gates of wisdom. We strive to teach this wisdom of the Torah and life to the child. The last two letters of naar spell ער, which translates as “to awaken.” The goal of education is to awaken the person from within to seek out truth and enlightenment. This is the deeper meaning behind the mitzva of “parsumey nisah, publicizing the miracle,” we strive to bring the fire from within to the outside. We light at dark in order to bring out our light and until the time that “the feet (of people) are cleared from the street (Shabbos 21b).” The reference to “feet” hints to Yaakov who was punched in the thigh (mid-leg area).

When we light the Menorah we are told in Jewish law to hold the candle to the wick until the wick catches fire and is able to burn on its own. This is the exact way that the Kohen Gadol was commanded to light the Menorah in the Beis HaMikdash (see Bamidbar 8:1 and Rashi ad loc.). This is the purpose of chinuch to light and inspire our youth to carry the flame of the Torah based on internal recognition and conviction.

When Yaakov went back for the small pach, the Shach al HaTorah brings down from a Midrash that he was returning back to get the jug of oil that would later be found during the time of Chanukah. Additionally, Rabbeinu Bechaya states that the jugs were called “pachim ketanim” because they were jugs belonging to the children. Another hint to children. Chanukah is so deeply hinted to by the entire episode of Yaakov and the angel of death (Chazal say that he is the same as Saro Shel Esav) and the lesson of teaching our children about the beauty of life and Hashem. This is the entire theme of Al HaNissim, to give thanks to Hashem.

The Greeks made the Jews write, “God has forsaken you” on all of their ox horns (Berieshis Rabbah 2:4). What was this decree all about? It has been noted that in ancient times baby bottles were made out of ox horns as their funnel shape was optimal for their task. Thus, the Greeks tried to force the Jews to raise their children under the influence of denying Hashem. This is why the word “darkness” refers to Greece (Midrash ibid.) for they wished to darken the world for religious Jews. The Jews fought back and instead educated their youth to love and be committed to Torah. Some say that the draidel was played by children who were learning Torah and needed to fool the Greeks into thinking that they were simply gathered for game tournaments.

Chanukah is a time where we show children that “a small light can shine forth and push away much darkness” (Chovos HaLevavos). This may be the reason that there is a custom to give gift and money to children, in order to draw them into the simcha of Chanukah. We each have a child within. This Chanukah may we find the inspiration and strength to see the beauty of Torah and life and may the lesson remain with us as we continue our spiritual journey through life.